Troy,
See comments in the attached paper for needed revisions. The biggest concern is you need to work on condensing the information and adding clarity. Your paper is getting too long. The checklist and template target the entire paper to be between 10 to 12 pages. A little over will be okay, but they will kick a paper that is overly long. Remember this is to be a brief concise concept paper with the purpose of substantiating the need for your study and showing you have the understanding of what is involved in order to obtain candidacy. When you submit your next assignment please upload a clean copy of your entire paper along with the checklist with page numbers in your information filled in. These will be used to grade for accuracy and completeness.
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