921758
an hour ago
First, the big thing: your research essay. What you submitted isn’t considered complete because you are missing 1 additional secondary resource. In using multiple Harry Potter novels (many of which aren’t included on the Works Cited page though quoted from in the body of the essay, you are building the project through literature. These pieces are the texts we analyze through literary-critical and other secondary sources. You can use as many literary texts as you want/need to, but you must have a minimum of 3 secondary materials that help you to analyze the literature. And, there are issues in the essay in terms of organization and development. When I re-read it again this morning, I noticed that the piece feels like 2 distinct projects, one that looks at Perrault’s “Cinderella” and its core themes, and one that flies through a few different Harry Potter books. There is a loose connection between the literature and the themes common to “Cinderella” stories, but the paragraph organization and thesis development don’t demonstrate a clear sense of purpose to the project. I also think you are trying to reply on a handful of snippets from a few HP texts without thinking about them as a whole. To get this essay up to at least a 2, you will need to do the following:
* create a thesis statement that visibly and clearly connects an aspect of Perrault’s “Cinderella” and an aspect of the Harry Potter story. For the size of this essay, it’s much better to choose one of the books from the series that you know well and use that to evolve your argument. All of the books work well for this purpose, but Book 1 is particularly strong in its connections to “Cinderella” story themes like transformation, reclaiming lost power, social hierarchies, the significance of fire literally and figuratively, and so on.
* organize the essay around points that support your argument from both pieces of literature, using secondary research to build your original perspective. You need to draft your body paragraphs so that they demonstrate not just a strong sense of the connection you see between the literature but also of the writing competencies we’ve worked on all semester, namely: evidence integration style and formatting and evidence analysis focusing on elements of literature and authorial intention. Use the Writing Tips and Tools Booklet to help you visualize the components. You could even create a template from it detailing everything that should be filled in for each paragraph, which some students find really helpful.
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